Ditching
by Dolphinogirl
Summary: What would happen if Edward came back but Bella didn't want him? What would Edward do? Well, he might go crazy. This ought to be interesting......
1. Chapter 1

I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT OR ANY TWILIGHT CHARACTERS

BPOV

I stopped my truck outside of the former Cullen mansion. Just looking at it made me sick. Why was I even here? I should go. I really should go. _HE_ left me. I didn't do anything wrong…..or did I?

I couldn't do this anymore. I turned the key in the ignition and turned the truck around. I didn't want to fall apart here. Home maybe, but not here. I started to drive home, doing everything in my power to not think of him. But that wasn't exactly logical, now was it? Why shouldn't I think of him? I was hurting now so why shouldn't I go all out and hurt more? Edward. There I mentally said it. But, ouch that stung.

"Edward," I said aloud. That hurt even more.

HA! I said it! This was the end of it. I am not going to let him destroy me anymore. Sure, my heart was broken. But I didn't exactly enjoy wallowing in my self pity. I pulled into the driveway. Charlie's cruiser was here, so I had to put on my pathetic act so I wouldn't scare him. But from now on, I vowed, I would try to make that more me, and less of an act. I walked through the back door into the kitchen.

"Dad?" He probably was in the living room watching TV.

"In here, Bella," he replied, confirming his whereabouts. "Watching the game."

'Okay. What do you want for dinner?" I called out to him, on my way into the living room to join him. I sat down on the couch, across from him in his recliner. He muted the TV and looked over at me.

"Doesn't really matter to me. Whatever you feel like cooking. We can get pizza if you don't want to have to cook," he said. Poor Charlie. I didn't like making him suffer along with me.

I forced a smile. "Doesn't much matter to me either. Who's playing?"

He seemed surprised that I took (fake) interest in the game. "The Mariners and the Red Sox. Score's 4-3, Red Sox winning."

"Oh, cool." Not really. Baseball is boring. I can't play any sports, let alone walk on a flat surface, without injuring those around me. I am literally a danger to all mankind. I should get a t-shirt with a 'HAZARD' symbol on the back of it.

I walked into the kitchen and looked around for possible dinner inspiration. Not much, I really needed to go grocery shopping.

"Hey Dad?" I called.

"Yeah Bells?" He responded, obviously distracted by the baseball game on the TV.

I walked back into the living room to try to get him to focus.

"How hungry are you? Can dinner wait for me to go grocery shopping?" I asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Do you need money?" He asked exactly what I was just going to say.

'Yep. Thanks, Dad. I'll be back soon." I said. He handed over a few 20 dollar bills. I grabbed the money, got my coat, and car keys and was on my way.

Having ripped the stereo that the….the… Cullens gave me, out of my truck; I was now out of a sound system. I hadn't really _wanted _to listen to music for the past seven months.

Too many damn love songs, out there to mock me. 'HAHA! You're all alone!! Ha ha ha ha!' I really needed psychological help – I was thinking that love songs could talk. Wow. But I needed to be a big girl about this. It is April, for God's sake. He….. Edward left me in September. _September. _It is now _April._ I really needed to build a bridge and get over it. Which is now what I decided to do.

I want music. I want metal, loud, head-banging music. Music where the words make no sense. Music that I could get lost in. I started to think of ways to fulfill this wish as I shopped at the supermarket. I had a vague idea of what I was going to do tonight, as I pulled into my driveway again, this time with groceries. After making Charlie his dinner, I cleaned up and got ready.

**A/N **

** Please review! I don't really know how I like this so far, and your opinions will really help me to figure out if I want to continue with this or not. You don't need an account to review so there really isn't a reason why you can't review for me. Thanks!**


	2. Chapter 2

**I own Twilight? Haha I wish. I do not own anything - Stephenie Meyer does and I thank her for letting me play in her Twilight world. I don't own Whip It either.**

BPOV

I, Bella Swan, for the first time in my life, was going to go clubbing and was going to go to a concert. This ought to be interesting, I thought to myself as I contemplated what to wear. I wondered what Alice would have picked to wear for this sort of activity. It didn't bother me that much anymore to think of any of the Cullens. To think about Edward still stung a little bit, but that was completely normal after a break-up right? Especially when it was a vampire who you thought you were going to spend all of eternity with? Yeah, totally and completely normal to be a bit heartbroken. But I wasn't going to think of any of that tonight.

I picked out some dark wash skinny jeans and an orange tank top. It was going to be hot in the clubs right? But a tank top wasn't really the most rational piece of clothing to wear in Forks, or even Port Angeles, where I would be going. And Charlie would most definitely noticed if I strolled downstairs wearing tight jeans and a somewhat revealing tank top. By my idea of revealing, of course, not Alice's. I don't think she even thinks anything is revealing. Anyway, it was a scoop neck tank, not one that plunged down to my belly button. So I picked out a jacket to wear over it, that I sometimes wore as a shirt. Charlie wouldn't be a bit suspicious of my outfit.

But what was my cover-up going to be? I couldn't exactly lie to him. For one thing, I suck at lying. He can totally tell. My face turns bright red and I'm slow to think of cover-up responses. And another thing is that this is Forks, for God's sake. Charlie, being Chief of Police, knew everything that happened in this one horse town. It still surprised me that there were no hillbillies. Maybe I could tell him I was going to go to the movies with Jessica or Angela.... No way would he find out. Who am I kidding? Jessica's mom, Mrs. Stanley worked at the bank and was one of Forks' big gossipers. If there was a town scandal - she would be the one most likely to spread the rumors. When Charlie goes to the bank and says something about me and Jess going to the movies - I' m so screwed. Even though Angela's mom was a bit more low-key, she would probably tell Charlie too, that me and Angela had not been to the movies.

But....what if there was someone I could go see whose parents would definitely not rat me out? I had already thought about using the Cullens as an excuse, to say that I was going to go meet Esme or Alice - but Charlie had seen me when they left. Even Alice, who I loved dearly, would take a little time for me to trust again. Edward...I might never be able to trust again. I didn't really blame Esme or Carlisle for leaving, but Edward definitely was responsible for this suffering. Or maybe, I was to blame, being the weak pathetic human that I am. That was the thing that was still puzzling me. _Why_ had they left? Still, Charlie knew that I wouldn't forgive them that easily. But I still had one person, who would let me do whatever the hell I wanted, so long as I didn't get injured.

Thank God my mom had insisted upon giving me a cell phone when I was 15 and had insisted I keep it when I moved to Forks. It really comes in handy when I want to make private phone calls. It's also nice not to have to go downstairs and get the phone. Then Charlie would see me and I'd have to go through a billion questions from him. Mentally thanking my mom's paranoia, I quickly dialed the number and the person I needed answered the phone.

"Hello?"

"Hi, it's Bella. What are you doing tonight? I really need you."

With that one sentence, I had my plan in form. I felt kind of mad about manipulating him, but it was worth it. I needed this. Reckless was the one adjective that described the new Bella. Along with carefree, fun-loving, and maybe just plain stupid.

I looked in the mirror before I left my room. I took a deep breath, straightened my clothes, and pushed my hair out of my face. I forced a smile. That looked crappy. I needed to put more effort into this look. I turned in a circle and scanned my room for my rarely used make-up bag. I found it on top of my desk. I took out a tube of mascara, eyeliner and lip gloss. I should try to look pretty tonight,. I carried those over to my mirror and put them on. I made sure the mascara was waterproof and sweatproof. I didn't really want to look like a racoon with mascara lines streaming down my face when I began to sweat. Or God forbid, if something happened and I ended up crying.

There. All done. I put my make-up stuff back in its bag and looked again at myself in the mirror. I smiled again, trying to make it look more natural and I succeeded.

I looked myself in the mirror and gave myself a pep talk.

"Now Bella, you are going to have a good time tonight with Jacob. He's your best friend, maybe more. You can do this. You are going to pretend to happy and maybe actually be happy." I took another deep breath and looked my reflection in the eyes.

Charlie poked his head in. "Bells?"

"Yeah, Dad?" I asked, trying to act all nonchalant.

"Who were you just talking to? And why are you all dressed up?" Why on earth did Charlie have to pay attention to me _tonight?_

"I....er....I was reading a book. I was so into it that I accidentally said it aloud. Sorry, Dad." I said back to him.

"Okay, but why are you all dressed up?"

Crap. Crap. Crap!

"Dad, for one thing, I am not 'dressed up'. I'm really bored so me and Jake are going to go to the movies tonight in Port Angeles and then maybe get something to eat. No big deal." I said. Please, oh please, do not notice the concert tickets on my desk, or that I'm wearing make-up or that I have a purse that happens to have money in it.

"Oh, okay. You said you're going with Jake?" he questioned.

"Yep. No big thing, Dad. It's _Jacob._ The boy we've both known forever. It's not a big deal at all. We're friends." I had to keep lying to him.

"Well, okay then. I know things have been kind of awkward between you two so I'm glad you guys are friends again," he said, clearly embarassed by having to have this conversation with his eighteen year-old daughter. I can only imagine how bad it would have been if I had been with Charlie when I got my first period. Or if he had been the one to give me the sex talk. Those conversations hadn't been awkward at all with my mom. My mom was my best friend. There were no awkward situations or stupid questions. Sometimes, I wished that she could have been more of a mom to me than a friend, but I still loved her and I know that she did as best as she could raising me.

"Yeah, about that," I said, "We might be a little late tonight. It's a special midnight premiere thing, so I don't know exactly when I'll be home." Oh please, please, please, please, please, please, please don't say anything. It's not like he really had any say in it; I'm 18. I had to make this up because I had no idea when the concert would end.

"It's just going to be you and Jacob?" he asked, raising one eyebrow. He searched my face for any hint of me lying. I didn't have to work extra hard on my repsonse because it really was the truth.

"Yes. Just me and Jake." I replied honestly. Thank goodness I bought an extra concert ticket. I don't think we'd have a problem getting in because I actually am 18 and Jacob could easily pass for 20 with his height and unnaturally large muscles.

"That's fine. And if you get too tired, you can just crash at Billy's. He won't mind if you stay over." My wonderfully oblivious father replied.

"Okay, I'll probably come home though. I've got to get ready - Jacob will be here any minute to pick me up." I said, trying to hide my ecstasy that I had permission to basically stay out all night.

"Alright. Have fun," was my father's distracted response as he headed down the stairs; probably off to watch some baseball game.

The realization that my dad was actually okay with me staying out all night and then spending the night at a _boy's _house was shocking. Granted, it was Jacob. Jacob was practically family. But what my dad didn't know was that Jake and I had tried to date, but it didn't really work out. Honestly, I didn't know what our status was. We're such a couple at times, but at other times, we're just two best friends hanging out. I love Jacob, don't get me wrong, but it'll never be the same love I had for Edward. I shook my head, trying to shake off the thoughts as well. I'm not thinking about that tonight, I reminded myself.

"Hey, Bella." I felt two warm arms wrap around me and lips kiss my head. See what I mean about the dating thing? And what is it with guys just coming into my room? Not that it wasn't adorable.

I turned around while staying in his arms. "Hey, Jacob." I whispered. Jacob was so big! I don't think I'd ever get used to how high I had to look up to look into his eyes. His eyes were so pretty and I loved it when he looked at me like this. I felt so lucky to be his, but Jake deserved so much more.

"You ready to go?" he asked.

"Yup. Let's go. You remember the cover-up story, right? We're going to a midnight premiere of a movie. Charlie even said I could stay over at your house tonight," I added with a devilish grin. "I might want to take him up on that."

"Yes, I remember the story. And I would love that." Jake smiled.

He took my hand and led me down the stairs into the living room. Once we were downstairs, I pulled my hand away from his. He didn't even give me a look because he knew that Charlie didn't know about us.

"Night Dad. Don't wait up on me - I might not come home tonight. If I'm not here in the morning, it's because I stayed at Jacob's alright?" I asked my dad as Jake helped me put my coat on.

"Sure thing. What movie are you kids going to go see anyway?" Charlie asked. Surprisingly, he was actually participating in conversation. Curious, I looked over to the TV and it was commercial, which explained Charlie's attentiveness.

"I got it," Jacob whispered to me. "We're going to go see Whip It, that new movie directed by Drew Barrymore. The one about roller-derby." I love Jacob's wits. He amazes me. It would have taken me 10 years to come up with a response like that, and Charlie didn't even notice Jake's momentary pause.

"That sounds good. Have fun, kiddo," he said to me.

"Okay Dad. Night."

"Night."

"See ya Charlie," was Jacob's hearty response.

As soon as the front door was shut and Charlie couln't see out the front window, Jake wrapped his arm around me and brought me close to him. I leaned my head on his upper arm, as I was too short to rest my head on his shoulder. I reached into my back pocket and gave him his concert ticket, which he put in his pocket. We got into his car and our night officially began.

**A/N**

**Please review!!! It helps me to write better. Even if you hate it, please write a nice review explaining why you hate it. Thank you!!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N**

**Sadly, I didn't get many reviews last chapter. The only reviews I got were from my two best friends (in real life), I love them dearly and their opinions mean a lot to be, but I want other people's opinions. So please review. You don't need an account and it doesn't have to be a long review either – just tell me if you like it or not. Thanks!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any Twilight characters. I would like to thank (AGAIN) Stephenie Meyer for allowing us FanFiction addicts to use her material.**

**Nor do I own or claim to own any Flyleaf or Disturbed songs, lyrics, or concert techniques.**

**I'll shut up now. Promise. **

**  
****  
**Chapter 3

_BPOV_

"You warm enough?" Jacob asked. We were sitting in his VW Rabbit, the car he had proudly rebuilt himself. Jake was my cover-up for me tonight. My father thought we were going to a movie. We were really going to a concert and then clubbing. I owed Jacob big time for tonight.

"Toasty. You excited?" I asked, wanting to know if he was only doing this for me, or if he truly did want to go out.

"Hell yeah! I'm going out with a beautiful girl who is going to sneak little underage me into a concert, clubs, and maybe a bar." Jacob looked over and smiled at me. We had pulled over at the bottom of my road so we could talk, without Charlie coming out and yelling at us. Well, maybe we pulled over for a bit more than talking.

I leaned over and kissed him and he kissed me back. Jake slid closer to me, and put his hand in the small of my back, bringing me closer to him. When I finally pulled my lips away from his, I was breathless. And by the sounds of it, so was he.

I smiled at him. He kissed my forehead.

"Wanna go?" He asked.

"Yes, please." I said, content.

The ride to Port Angeles was practically silent. But it wasn't awkward. That was the nice thing with Jacob. Things were rarely awkward. He gave me my space without ignoring me and he cared enough but wasn't nosy. He was almost perfect. But I made sure he wasn't perfect, because I'd had experience with perfect people. They say they love you, and then they leave.

***Cough* EDWARD *Cough***

Jacob pulled into the jam packed parking lot. There were barely any spots left. After a few minutes of driving around, we found a parking spot and got out. Jake came around to the other side and helped me get out. He put his arm around me and we walked to the venue. I didn't normally allow this but hey what the hell. I was sick of denying that Jacob and I didn't have "a thing". And I had finally come to the realization that I needed to get over Edward. I didn't really _want_ to spend the rest of my life pining over him.

We had our tickets scanned and had no problem getting in. Jacob started to pull me back to where we would have sat but I tugged his hand and he stopped. He looked at me with a confused expression.

"What?" He had to yell to be heard over the noisy crowd. And the concert hadn't even started yet!

"I want to go down into the mosh pit!" I told him on a whim. This new badass Bella was even scaring me!

"You sure?" Jake asked, "It's crazy down there!"

"Yeah, I'm sure! Let's do it!" I said back.

We worked our way down to the mosh pit. I had never been to a concert, let alone moshing. I would probably die tonight, but oddly, I was okay with that. Once we finally got as close to the stage as possible, I took in my surroundings. I was constantly being pushed and bumped into by tons of people. A lot of them were kind of scary looking with piercings on every available facial surface and tattoos on everywhere that couldn't be pierced. Not to mention all the colored hair and chains hanging from the pants. But, there were a lot of normal looking people too. And to my utter shock, a bunch of tween girls that didn't seem supervised at all. And I had the death grip on Jacob's hand during all of this, embarrassingly enough.

"Sorry." I said. I looked up at him with an apologetic smile.

"It's fine. I'm glad you're finally warming up about 'us' being in public together now. It's a relief." His eyes showed that he said this in all honesty.

"You're right. I am. I love you, Jake." What a weird time for that to slip out of my mouth.

"And you know I love you. I've told it to you before." He replied. That was true. Jake always had told me he loved me; and he never expected it from me in return.

I kissed him, for once not really caring if people saw. It was nice.

The lights dimmed and the already dark room got practically pitch black. The familiar lyrics of Flyleaf's 'All Around Me' came all around me and Jacob. Once you got over how scary it was here in the pit, moshing was actually kind of fun. The energy of the crowd swallowed me up. I danced with Jake, well as much as possible - the people in the mosh pit were packed like sardines in a can. 

After Flyleaf was done, Disturbed came on. They started off with 'Perfect Insanity' one that described me.....now. I pulled Jake's head down to my level and yelled "I'M GOING TO GO THE BATHROOM AND GET SOME AIR, OKAY?" I had to scream right next to his ear, for any hope of him hearing me.

"YEAH." He screamed back. "WANT ME TO COME WITH YOU?"

"NO THANKS, I'M GOOD. SEE YOU IN A FEW."

I pushed my way out to the hall outside of the area where the concert was. It was a relief to have my own personal space again. I made my way to the bathroom and splashed some water on my warm face. It helped a little. Once I was done, I made sure I still had my ticket, and went outside for some fresh air. I opened the door and thank God, there was a cool night breeze. It was so refreshing. I loved the night. I loved its clarity and how it made me feel so close to nature.

I fished my ticket out of my pocket and went back to the front door. I gave it to the person at the door and started to make my way back in.

An arm jutted out across the doorway, preventing me from going inside.

"Sorry, but there's no re-admitance." The burly-looking guy said to me.

"You're kidding right? I wasn't even out here for two whole minutes!" I said back to the guy, starting to get a bit peeved.

"Sorry, those are the rules. You got out - you don't come back in."

"Please say you're just messing with me. My friend, well actually, my boyfriend is in there and he was expecting me back now. I need to get back in there!" My voice unintentionally got a bit frantic.

"You can't." His tone of voice told me that that decision was final.

I stolled off and kicked a beer can, that was laying on the ground, as hard as I could.

"Dammit!!!" I screamed. Screaming and throwing a tantrum wasn't nearly as helpful as I thought it was going to be.

"And what did the poor beer can do to deserve being kicked?" A smooth voice from behind me asked.

"Screw you," I mumbled. I then turned around to see who was speaking to me.

I must have stood there awestruck for at least five minutes.

I then heard Jacob behind me saying, "Bella! What happened? The guy at the door said he wouldn't let you back in and I came to get you, but you weren't........" Jake's voice trailed off when he saw me and the person who I was gawking at like an imbecile.

"What are you doing here?" Jacob asked, his voice all pissy.

Edward. Cullen. That's who the voice belonged to.

What the hell?

**(Another) Author's Note **

**Super long chapter just for xaprilshwrs96 and Empress of Blood. I love you guys and I hope other people find my story and are just as supportive of my work as you two are. Thanks!**


	4. Chapter 4

_**A/N**_

_**OMG THANK YOU FOR EACH AND EVERY REVIEW! It is amazing how four reviews boost my self-esteem and self-confidence. I was talking to xaprilshwrs96 the other day about our writing. I was showering her in compliments (as usual) and she explained to me how she brings her emotions in the story without making it an autobiography of her life. Given some recent events in **__**my**__** life, I think I'm finally able to take that message to heart. Love you, twin 3**_

_**Anyways, thank you sooo much! It is appreciated more than you will ever know. I was convinced my writing sucks, but apparently it doesn't.......So keep reviewing with each chapter in order for me to write another one. the more reviews I get, the faster the next chapter will be up. **_

_**I'm done.....for now *evil laugh****_

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight Saga books, movies, or characters. My extreme thanks to the genius mind of Stephenie Meyer who created this series and who is kind enought to let me waste time in this world :)**

**I also do not own or claim to own the Hannah Montana TV show, music, or merchandise. I also do not own any of Akon's songs, including 'Lonely'**

Chapter 4

BPOV

Him. Here. Edward.

Why?

I wasn't exactly forming coherent questions as I stood there, staring at him. In fact, I was surprised I was still upright and on my feet.

'Bella?!" Jacob stood in front of me, breaking my gaze from Edward. He shook my shoulders and lowered his head to look me in the eyes.

I shook my head, trying to clear my mind. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Gathering as much courage as humanly possible given my current situation, I opened my eyes and once again became the 'new Bella'.

''Yeah?" I looked directly back at Jacob. I was going to prove to him that I only loved him anymore, even though my heart achingly proved that I obviously loved more than just him.

"What's going on? Why is _he_ here?" Jake asked me, his voice filled with contempt. His arm possesively wound around me.

"Honestly, I don't really know. The guy at the door wouldn't let me back in and then he showed up. I'm as shocked as you." I said. I was going to be honest, as much as it killed me.

I looked to.....Edward. He hadn't said anything to me since he had scolded me for kicking the beer can. Jacob, as usual, was right. Why the hell _was_ Edward here?

"Why _are_ you here?" I asked him.

"Why are _you_ here?" He replied. Touché.

"Okay, for one thing I asked you first. And second of all, it is none of your damn business why I'm here. I'm 18. So _back_ off." I said. Maybe a bit too much attitiude. But

hey, he left me.

"I know that it's none of my business anymore. Unfortunately." He said, with that crooked smile that I used to adore. Used to. Not anymore.

"So, smartass, why are you here?!" Jake asked him, really getting mad now.

"Jacob," I said quietly. I elbowed him in the gut. Sure, Edward was a jerk for leaving me and owed me an explanation, but that wasn't a reason to be so mean to him. Who am I kidding? HE LEFT ME. Alone. Crushed. You get the idea. Jacob _should_ be mean to him. Really mean.

"No he's right. Why am I here?" Edward stared off into space and that combined with his words made him seem like a total mental patient: insane.

"Okay then. You ponder on that and I'm gonna blow this popsicle stand, kay?" My voice was layered with false sugary-sweetness.

No response. He just looked at me with a creepy blank expression. Like the expression of a sleeping person. Really creepy.

"Let's go. Now." I said. I yanked Jake's hand and dragged him away from there. What was that? Gosh, I'm such a bitch at times. But Edward deserved what I had just given him. I wasn't even that mean to him. He deserved more. He deserved _pain. _Agony. Gut-wrenching, girly shrieking PAIN.

Jacob and I walked quickly back to the car and climbed in.

"Well, that was weird." Jake said with a grin, as he buckled his seat belt.

I chuckled. "Yeah. You can say that again. Weird is a major understatement."

"Well, that was weird." Jacob said with a huge smile plastered on his face. He loved to mess with my head and took me very literally at times. But now, he was doing it just to mess with me....hopefully.

I reached over, smacked his head, and rolled my eyes with as much sarcasm as I could muster. Internally, I was nowhere near mentally stable. Edward was here. Edward was here!! But that didn't matter. I was almost 19 now. It had been a long time since he'd left me. Four days after my 18th birthday. Surprisingly, I still remembered. I doubted that I would ever forget. I was still completely traumatized from seeing Edward outside of the concert, but I had to hide the turmoil inside me. It was not fair to Jacob to see me like this. Again. He had been the one to help me get back to human again. I owed him so much. And right now, I owed him the favor of not showing him how I was really feeling.

"Idiot." I muttered.

"I know. But I'm good at it, right?" I swear there are times when I'm an idiot for not making him my boyfriend 's so cute!

"Yes. You are very good at it. You're going to win the Nobel Peace Prize of Stupidity. Congratulations. Don't forget to mention me in your acceptance speech, okay?" I looked at him and smiled.

"Anything for you, babe. So where are we going now?" Jake asked.

"I don't really know," I replied, quite honestly.

"You wanna go home?" The gentleman in him came out when he said that; you could tell by his voice that there was no way he actually want to go home.

"Absolutely not. Do you want to drive around Port Angeles?" I asked him.

"Not really," he laughed. "How about we drive to Seattle? That's the closet city to here. And neither of our parents really care how late we stay out tonight so we can actually have some fun. What do you say about that?"

"I say that I love you and that you are my freaking hero." I slid over and kissed him lightly.

"That works for me. Now slide over to your seat, little girl, and let me start the car and get driving, alright?" He faked a fatherly attitude.

"Why of course, Daddykins. Nothing would please me more," I played along. "But it would be really perverted if I had just made out with my dad, ya know?" That was meant as rhetorical question, of course, but as usual, Jake didn't get that.

"Well, then that would mean that I would have the hots for my daughter." He said with a devilish look on his face. I don't even want to know the images going on in that boy's head. Way too much information.

I put the radio on and we fought over what music should be on. Neither of us really won, we got to listen to my alternative/punk/rock/mellow/chill/oldies/country/modern taste in music on the way there and his pop music on the way back. If I hadn't known better, Jacob's choice in music would have convinced me that he was gay. I told him this and then he acted all offended. It was quite hilarious, actually.

"I do not listen to girly music!" He exclaimed.

"Yes, you do! What other 17 year old guys listen to Hannah Montana?!" I was laughing hysterically as I said this; I was surprised he could even understand me.

"Lots of guys do!" Jake said.

"Yeah, lots of _gay_ guys." BURN!

"Well, why are you so racist against homosexuals?" he asked me.

"I am not!! Gay people rock, they define America. I am totally pro-gay." I shot back.

It went on like this for the next hour. From there, we just talked about different things going on in our lives. Like how he was a senior this year, what I was going to do for college, and so on. But we never went back to the subject of Edward.

The car ride was highly entertaining and I thought that the car ride was going to be the highlight of my evening, but boy, was I wrong.

We parked once we got to Seattle and just started walking around. We went to into a little coffee shop and got ourselves caffeinated. I mean, come on, how can you come to Seattle and not get coffee? It's America's coffee capital! By this time it was a little after one AM and I was a little sleepy. I rested my head on Jake's arm as we walked down the street holding hands.

"Do you want to go home yet?" He asked me.

"I love how you worry so much about me. And I really mean that - no sarcasm, Jake. But no, I don't really want to go home yet. Is that okay with you?" I picked up my head and looked at him.

He looked down at me. "I really do care about you. So much. And I'm ready to go home whenever you are, so take your time."

I sighed, really content for once. Life was good. But then Edward drove by in his silver Volvo screaming, "GET A ROOM!" with Akon's 'Lonely' blaring and life became hell once again.

**Yet another A/N**

**I hope you guys like this....do I end my chapters with cliff hangers too often or what? lol :) **

**So please review! The more reviews I get, the faster I'll update. You don't need a fanfic account....just press that cute little green review button! Come on, we know you want to :p **

**I love you guys 3 and thank you**


	5. Chapter 5

_**A/N**_

_**Hello again! Thanks so much for the reviews and adding me to your Story Alerts and Favorite Authors....It really means a lot to me :) And please do not hesitate to send me a PM if you're not understanding anything in my story. I would be more than happy to answer any questions! So please continue to review and I'll keep updating!**_

_**Special shout outs to xaprilshwrs96 and Empress of Blood for reviewing and constantly answering my never ending questions even when I call them really late or really early. I love you guys so much! More shout outs to Maliha R Pattinson and i3pInk86 for reviewing. I love you guys too because you continually show me that my writing doesn't suck. Thank you! But I am kind of peeved at one thing. I had over 200 hits from over 15 different countries, which thrilled me, but only FOUR REVIEWS!! You don't need an account to review either! Just please review and give me your feedback! It'll help me to write better and more frequently. But please do remember that I'm only 14 and still have school and everything. I'll update much more on the weekends. Thanks.**_

_*****This story **_**is**_** rated M but this chapter contains more swearing than usual. You'll see why*****_

_**Wow!! Really long Author's Note today...sorry! And now I shall shuteth my moutheth. Here's some more fanfiction for y'all.,..**_

**Disclaimer: I do not own or claim to own the Twilight Saga books, movies, or characters. **

Chapter 5

BPOV

Great. Now I had a stalker. Now, thinking back, Edward used to do a bunch of creepy things like watching me sleep and insisting upon odd things like Alice watching me while he was gone hunting. But love _is_ blind, or so they say. Back then, I thought it was normal. Maybe he had just finally lost his mind. Maybe I had just lost MY mind!

This was all running through my mind as Jacb and I _tried_ to have a romantic evening. But that was ruined as we saw Edward a total of forty-eight times that night in Seattle. If it hadn't been for Jake seeing him too, I would have thought I'd gone schizophrenic and started hallucinating. The ride back to Forks was weird, Jake and I , for once, not knowing what to say to each other. It was the first time things got awkward. I didn't wasnt to say anything that would make him go all Psycho-Jeaslous Boyfriend on me and he didn't want to say anything to get me mad. Everytime I would look to see him, his face was a perfect display of a poker face. No emotion whatsoever. ARGH!!!!! KILL ME NOW!

After two and a half hours of utter silence, we were finally in Forks. Jacob drived to my house and pulled into my driveway.

He cleared his throat. "Well, good night, Bella." He said awkwardly.

"Good night Jacob. See you tomorrow?" I asked. I tried to get closer to him, but he leaned away.

"I don't know. I have stuff and yeah well...." He trailed off and stared out the window.

I reached over and grabbed his chin, forcing him to look at me.

"Jacob. Look at me. This is _not_ in any way, shape or form, MY fault. He showed up. I haven't had any contact with him in over a year. He just randomly showed up. I have no idea what the hell he's up to or what the hell he wants. But I swear, I have no idea. Okay?" I asked him. I wanted to deal with this now. I looked directly at him throughout my entire rant.

"Yeah, I don't really believe that. Come on Bella. He was your boyfriend. And I know you still have the hots for him. It was all over your face. And the thing that pisses me off the most is that you set me up. You tell me we're officially dating, make out with me in the middle of a concert, tell me you love me, then you disappear. Normally that's where it ends. But nooooo - not with you, Bella. You had to bring your boyfriend back and make me look like a fool. Well, congratualtions, you fucking win. Happy?"

The look on my face was a mixture of at least 20 different emotions. It probably looked pretty damn messed up.

Shocked. Hurt. Sad. Upset. Angry. Furious. Pained. Confused. Irritated. Aggrivated.

But pissed off summed it all up pretty well.

We must sat there for at least ten minutes staring at each other. But then I couldn't take it anymore. I had never been more irate in my entire life. I slowly got out of the car and slammed the car door as hard as I possibly could.

With as much dignity as I had left, I walked to the house. I fished the key out of bag and quietly opened the door. It was a little after 4 AM and I was exhausted. Hopefully, Charlie would be asleep. I hung my truck keys up on their hook and sat down at the kitchen table. My head slumped onto the table. What a night.

Let's review, shall we?

I become all badass and go to a concert.

I take Jacob with me.

I make out with him in public.

I tell him I love him

I'm not allowed re-entry to the concert and am stuck outside.

Edward, of all people, shows up at said concert.

Jacob and I go to Seattle, to kill time, and to just get away.

Jacob and I kiss again. Edward drives by, screaming at us to get a room. Then he drives away singing to Akon's "Lonely" which is blaring from his car stereo.

Jacob drives me home.

Jacob practically calls me a backstabbing slut.

I leave.

I'm alone.

Again.

I started to cry. And I don't stop.

**And that's it! I hope you guys like it. REVIEW!!! Please please please review! I'll update soon; Friday at the absolute latest, I promise! Sorry this chapter is so short - I just wanted to update ****something!**** More will be up soon!**

**REVIEW**


	6. Chapter 6

_**A/N**_

_**I AM SO SORRY THAT IT HAS TAKEN ME SO LONG TO GET MORE CHAPTERS OUT!! I FEEL REALLY BAD. I'M SORRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!**_

_**Thanks xaprilshwrs96 for all of the shout outs - you're incredibly awesome. She is an amazing author so please go read her story! And Empress of Blood – I forgive you for abandoning me for spring break..haha **_

_**Some sad news - only a few reviews :( Yet, I had tons of hits. I know you guys read 'em but you never review! It kills me!! I remember when I only used to read Fanfic and didn't write and it annoyed the living crap out of me when authors wrote LOOOONG Author's Notes saying PLEASE REVIEW!.....just like I do. So you can see I have come full circle. Once again, I will remind you guys that you do not need a FF account to review. There is NO EXCUSE WHY YOU CAN'T REVIEW! So please please please reivew. Otherwise, the story is just getting started...My original idea was a comedy for this, it's turned out a bit more serious though. This ought to get quite hilarious soon – within the next few chapters. **_

_**I promise that this will be my longest A/N, I swear, that they will never get any longer than this!!!! I'll keep updating. **_

_**Now......read!**_

Chapter 6

_BPOV_

_I walk around in circles in the woods. It's dark and eerie. I continue to walk around and around, hoping that I'm going in the right direction and not in circles. But the scenery gets more and more familiar. I have been here before. And even then I was alone. I start to panic, wanting to get out of the woods and back to civilization. And then I realize that I don't even remember coming __into__ the forest. The realization that I don't remember scares me. The fact that I'm alone also scares me. I scream. I've had this dream before. The dream where there is nothing. _

_But the thing that scares me the most is that I'm alone. Again._

My screams woke me up. I was sitting at the kitchen table in my clothes from last night. And I felt like absolute hell. For one thing, I fell asleep sitting in a hard wooden chair. For another, I slept about 4 hours in a sitting position with my head on the table. Oh, wonderful.

I sat up and then slowly let my head slump back down. I had such a bad migraine and my entire body was so stiff from my odd sleeping position. I tried to remember why the hell I was sleeping in the kitchen and then my memory informed me of last night in Seattle. I quickly tried to push those thoughts away but then decided not to remember my choice to be the hardcore, emotionless Bella. I hate myself at times. I really didn't want to think about my night with Jacob and Edward. So instead, I wallowed in self-pity for a few moments on all the things I had to do today and how much it'll suck because I'll be so sore.

I'm really still tired I thought. I looked up at the clock on the wall, which informed me that it was a little after eight A.M. Today was Saturday, so Charlie was probably out fishing or already at the police station. That's really weird though. If he had seen me like this, wouldn't he have woken me up? Oh well, maybe he left for work out the back door.

My brain was telling me to get up and start to get my life in order. My body was too exhausted to care. So I sat at the kitchen table for a while, feeling the warm sunshine come through the window and onto my back. That woke me up a little. Sunshine? In Forks? I got up way too fast and ran outside to the front yard.

Wow. It was actually sunny today. I held my arms out and leaned my head up toward the sky and I twirled around, absorbing the light. It felt so nice.

I hated to go back inside but I was gross. I had never showered last night when I came home and I felt like a greasy mess. So I got my bag and jacket off the kitchen table and headed upstairs. I put my jacket away in the hallway closet and went into my room. I put my bag away in my closet, got my bathroom stuff I needed, and went across the hall into the bathroom. I got undressed and started the water. I showered and shaved my legs. Odd as it might seem, it calmed me. The fruity and familiar smells of my body wash and shampoo helped me get myself together. I needed the alone time - today was bound to be an emotional roller coaster.

Reluctantly, I turned the water off and got out. I felt so much better, now that I had showered. Refreshed. Sticking to routine, I used my favorite Body Butter from Victoria's Secret - Strawberries & Champagne. Yum!

I wrapped a towel around myself and went across the hallway into my room. I opened the door to see Edward sitting on my bed. Oh _God. _

"What the hell are you doing here?!" I shrieked.

"Waiting for you, of course," he replied.

"I'm naked, you jackass! Get out!" I clutched the towel tighter as I screamed at him. The most annoying thing about this entire situation was how amused Edward's face was. He thought this was funny!

I must have really caught him by surprise because I was able to push him out my window. Or he allowed it. And the entire time I was pushing him out the window, he was laughing! With as much force as I had I gave one final push and watched as he tumbled out of my window. I continued to watch him run across my front yard and go running into the woods. And to top it all off, he was still laughing.

I sighed and shut my window. I made sure it was locked tight and that the curtains were shut. For some reason, I still didn't want to get dressed in my room, so I got some clothes and brought them to the bathroom.

I locked the door behind me. I sat down on the edge of the bathtub, put my head into my hands. Why on earth had Edward come this time? And why was I so  
resistant to him? For once, I had an answer to one of my questions. I was resistant to him because I didn't want my heart stomped on again. I didn't think I would be able to withstand it this time. It would completely destroy me.

Well, I wasn't going to get anything figured out today if I was wrapped up in a towel, now was I? I stood up and slowly began to get dressed.

I cleaned up my room and then sat on my bed. I had resorted to _cleaning_ to cure me of my relentless boredom. There was nothing to do, nobody to spend time with. The feeling of that was just so lonely.

Spending time with Jacob was obviously out of the question. Or was it? I thought. I grabbed my phone off my desk and dialed his number.

"Hello?" Asked the deep voice from the other line.

"Hi. Jake. It's…Bella." I said hesitantly.

He hung up. He hung up! So not fair.

I quickly hit redial.

"Hello?"

"Jacob! Hey!"

And he hung up again.

This continued for a few more minutes and then this happened.

"Jacob, please! I just want to talk to you!" Even I could hear the desperation in my voice. How embarrassing.

"What, Bella? What could you possibly have to say to me? Because honestly, I have nothing to say to you. What you did to me kind of already spelled it out." He spat at me harshly.

[Silence from my end of the conversation]

"Hmm?"

"That isn't fair at all! I did not set anything up!" I exclaimed.

"Yes it is. But whatever, Bella." He said.

"What the hell do you mean by whatever?"

"I mean that it's…whatever. You say one thing, I say another. Go cry to the vamp because he's obviously more important that I am or ever was to you."

"Fine. Don't listen to me. I hope you start to listen to people sometime during your life." I shoot back furiously and snap my phone shut.

He's got it all wrong! I was just starting to open up to him and then ….Edward came back. He was the source of all this discord between me and Jacob. So I shouldn't have called Jacob. I should have called Edward! He was the one I should have bitched at.

A phone call wasn't going to do this justice. I put a sweatshirt on and grabbed my keys. I quickly got into my truck and started the three mile drive to the white Cullen mansion in the woods. If he was back, he probably was there.

After a few minutes, I was there at the end of the driveway. I took a deep breath and drove down road. This needed to be sorted out as soon as humanly (or vampirely!) possible.

I got out and knocked on the door. Esme opened the door.

"Hi, Esme. Is Edward home?" I asked.

Taking me by surprise, she gave me a big hug. I laughed and hugged her back. I really had missed her. She was one of my favorites of the Cullen family. In fact, I loved them all. Well no…Rosalie was the exception, as usual.

"Bella. I've really missed you." Esme said in her sweet voice.

I smiled. "I've missed you too."

"Please come on in. It's been so long." She replied.

"Yes, it really has been a long time." Eleven months, three weeks, four days, and approximately twelve hours. Not like I was counting or anything.  
Esme led me into the living room where Emmett, Rosalie and Jasper were. The flat screen was tuned to a football game. Emmett and Rosalie were lying on the couch and Jasper was sitting in an arm chair.

'Well well. Look who it is, Jasper!" Emmett said sarcastically to Jasper. Rosalie smacked Emmett on the arm.

"Why you're right, Emmett boy! It tis the human girl!" Jasper said back. He got up and went upstairs. "Hey Bella" he said as he walked past me and then up the stairs.

I rolled my eyes. "Hey Jasper, Emmett. Nice to see you too. Hi, Rosalie." I said sort of timidly.

"Hello, Bella." She said. She sort of smiled too. Well, maybe she didn't hate me so much anymore. Or maybe Esme was making her act nice.

"Bella!" I heard from behind me. I turned around to see Alice coming down the stairs, dragging Jasper by the hand. She dropped his hand when she got to the bottom of the stairs and ran towards me, embracing me in a tight hug.

"Hi, Alice." I said, my voice a bit muffled.

"Come on." She said, this time dragging _me_ up the stairs.

"Okay." I knew better than to question the motives of the almighty Alice.

She dragged me into her and Jasper's room, and shut the door tightly behind us. She sat down on the bed and motioned for me to sit down next to her.

"How are you? And don't lie to me. I can pretty much see your answer in your face." She told me with a smile.

Dang. She knew me well. "Okay, how'd you know I was going to lie?"

"I know _you. _Now, talk to me!" She replied.

"I'm…managing." I said back hesitantly.

"Not very well. Actually, I take that back. You are managing extraordinarily well for a human."

"Why are you saying all this to me? _They_ can hear us downstairs and you know it. So please don't bother denying it." It is true. They are vampires. And not much is secret around here with all of the super hearing and special powers.

"Bella." She laughed. "This room is soundproofed. Obviously, I wouldn't bother bringing you up here if they could still hear us."

"Oh." I said back, sounding like a moron.

"Yep. So I'm guessing that you came here for a reason….?" She trailed off.

"Yeah. I need to talk to Edward." I replied.

She laughed again. "That's what I figured. Come on." She stood up, walked over to the door, and opened it. "Good luck," she said to me. Alice gave me a quick hug and then gently pushed me out into the hallway.

I walked down to the end of the hallway to his bedroom door. I sighed and knocked on the door. I had to deal with this sooner or later.

Maybe later would have been a better idea.

_**A/N**_

_**More will be coming – I promise! And once again, I'm really sorry that this chapter took SO long to get written and published. So please review and I'll update. Thanks!**_

_**-Dolphinogirl**_


	7. Chapter 7

_**MANY BIG HAPPY BIRTHDAY WISHES TO XAPRILSHWRS96!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LEAVE YOUR B-DAY MESSAGES FOR HER BY SENDING HER A PRIVATE MESSAGE (PM) THANKS IN ADVANCE!**_

_**A/N**_

_**Thanks for all the reviews – you guys rock. Thank you xaprilshwrs96 for your continuous support and advice. I've always written what **__**I've**__** wanted to write, but now I will consciously write from the heart. Happy birthday, my best friend! Empress of Blood – email/text/call/send a message in a bottle and have an alien deliver it to me!**_

_**WARNING: I'm going to try to switch points of view throughout this chapter. Please do not hesitate to tell me how much it sucks, how much I suck, how bad this story is, or if you desperately want to shave a kiwi like I wanted to yesterday. Also feel free to say how much it rocks, how much I rock, or once again the odd desire to shave a kiwi. All opinions are welcome via reviews…..the cruel, the kind, the hating and the loving **_____

**Disclaimer: I do not own or claim to own any of the Twilight Saga books, movies or characters. Everything belongs to Stephenie Meyer, and I thank her for letting me play in her awesome world. **

Chapter 7

_Edward's Point of View _

I saw her that night at that ridiculous concert, where she should not have been outside alone. She was still so beautiful. And her scent was still so painfully amazing.

Oh, Bella. I shouldn't have ever left. I missed her so much. But she didn't deserve an eternity of me. She deserved so much more.

I thought of all of this as I was lying on the couch in my room. My arms were behind my head and I was staring aimlessly at the ceiling. I sighed as I thought of Bella again. I wish she was still mine. But at least she still wasn't with the dog anymore. She was better off alone than with Jacob, the mutt. She could have gotten so hurt, spending her time with him. But then I thought of earlier this morning and I laughed out loud. She looked so furious when she found me in her room. And then she pushed me out the window! She never used to be so violent. But maybe she's changed. Just the thought of that breaks my heart. I still want her to be _my _Bella. I hate the fact that I can't say she's mine anymore.

But then I heard a sound that completely distracted me from my selfish thoughts. I heard her truck driving down the driveway. It wasn't exactly difficult to hear, a human probably could have heard the monstrous roar of that antique vehicle.

I anxiously waited for her to approach the house. That truck was _so_ slow. After waiting what felt like an eternity, I heard her pull up right in front of the house. I got off the couch and childishly peered out the window. I saw her get out of her truck and walk up the porch to knock on the door. Esme answered and I saw them hug. Bella looked like she genuinely missed Esme. They then entered the house and Bella had the awkward reunion with Emmett, Rosalie, and Jasper.

My door opened and I nearly jumped out of my skin. It was Alice, poking her head in the door. She grinned devilishly as if she knew she had caught me spying on Bella. But hey, it's Alice, I'm pretty sure she knew exactly what I was doing, i.e. stalking Bella.

I was embarrassed, even though it wasn't quite logical. This was Alice, for crying out loud. Alice who had practically set Bella and I up, for lack of a better phrase.

Alice came into my room. "Hey, Edward. You'll never guess who's here!"

"Go away." I grumbled. I really didn't need her gloating.

"Make me" She replied, sticking her tongue out at me.

I rolled my eyes. "Bye, Alice." I said, kicking her out of my room. She took the hint and left. I left my door open and heard her going down the stairs.

I heard Alice's delightedly girlish shriek of 'Bella!' There was then a moment of awkward silence. Extremely curious, I quietly creeped into the hallway and looked down the stairs.

Alice and Bella were hugging. Now I felt twice as horrible. Bella missed us. Well, all of us except for me. And probably Rosalie too, I thought with a smile.

I then heard Alice bringing Bella upstairs and I frantically rushed back to my room. Alice would obviously have heard me, but Bella wouldn't have known I had been eavesdropping.

Alice dragged Bella into her and Jasper's room and they sat down.

I felt like a commentator from ESPN giving the play-by-play.

Alice: "How are you? And don't lie to me. I can pretty much see your answer in your face."

Bella: "Okay, how'd you know I was going to lie?"

Alice: "I know _you. _Now, talk to me!"

Bella: "I'm…managing."

Alice: "Not very well. Actually, I take that back. You are managing extraordinarily well for a human."

Bella: "Why are you saying all this to me? _They_ can hear us downstairs and you know it. So please don't bother denying it."

Alice: "Bella." She laughed. "This room is soundproofed. Obviously, I wouldn't bother bringing you up here if they could still hear us."

Bella: "Oh."

While that was true, I could still read Alice's mind, therefore seeing and hearing their conversation. I felt so accomplished, beating Alice.

Alice: "Yep. So I'm guessing that you came here for a reason….?"

Bella:  "Yeah. I need to talk to Edward."

Alice: She laughed again. "That's what I figured. Come on." She stood up, walked over to the door, and opened it. "Good luck," Alice hugged her again and then pushed her out into the hallway.

~End of Commentary~

It was utterly pathetic how I was doing everything in my power to be with Bella. I was listening to her conversations by stalking my sister's mind!

I don't think I had ever felt as human as I did when Bella walked down the hallway to my bedroom door. Vampires were supposed to be superior to humans and not be scared of anything. But I was honestly scared of this human girl who was less than five feet away from me, a wooden door separating us. She had the power to completely destroy me. My life was all for Bella. She was my only reason anymore and I had left her. _Left_ her.

Bella sighed and timidly knocked on my door. I sighed and then opened my door. There was Bella, as beautiful as ever, here to see _me. _

"Hello." I said to her. As hard as I tried not to, I ended up smiling at her.

"Hello" She replied.

This was going to be horribly awkward. Even if I could have read her mind, I knew how weird she thought this was going to be. It was written all over her face.

We just stood there for a moment, staring at each other.

~BPOV~

I had to do this. I had to get it over with. I had to confront Edward and demand to know what his problem was. Why was he stalking me? Why was even back in Forks? Why? Why? Why? My list of questions was endless as he opened the door.

"Hello." Edward said to me, smiling.

"Hello," I repeated, not really sure what else to say.

It was, without a doubt, the most awkward moment of my entire life – that moment spent with Edward and I staring at each other. Neither of us didn't really know what to do. Neither of us had ever had a conversation with someone we had broken up with. Scratch that – we hadn't ever broken up with some one. We were both equally inexperienced, so that made it even worse.

"So do you want to come in?" Edward asked me. He motioned into his room.

"Um….yeah. Sure. That'd be great." I said back, sounding like a total moron.

I walked into his room and looked around. Nothing had changed. It looked exactly as it had the last time I had been in here. I looked out the window for a minute and stared out at the rain. I heard Edward come to the window too and look out with me.

"I don't know what to say" he said.

I turned and faced him. "Neither do I." I replied. I might as well be honest. But……."But I _do_ want to know why you're here, and why you've kind of been stalking me the past few days."

He chuckled. "Stalking? That's a strong accusation."

"Well, stalking is a serious crime." I said, looking him straight in the eye.

"Touché." He told me with a smile.

I sighed. He wasn't making this any easier for me,

"Edward!" I exclaimed. "I don't know what's going on, and I want things completely straightened out before I leave here today." Just being near him again made me feel so alive. I had forgotten what it felt like to be so happy. It was madness that the simplicity of Edward's presence created this insane ecstasy.

"I know what I want." He said.

"Oh yeah, really?" I sarcastically asked.

"Yeah." He took a step closer to me. He looked directly at me and I looked back at him. He leaned in closer to me slowly, checking if this was okay, And being the imbecile I am, I didn't stop him. I was the one who leaned in more and kissed him. I put my arms around him and held on when he pulled away. He put his arms around me and hugged me back, There were no words to describe just how much I missed him. He was such a vital part of my life. I literally needed him to survive. Without him, I wasn't whole. But without Jacob, I wasn't whole either. I sighed and pulled away from Edward. We both looked at each other. Golden eyes to brown ones. Lovely.

"I'm in a pickle here. You know that right?" I asked Edward.

"Yes. I know. But at the moment, I don't really care." He replied seriously.

"Good. At the moment, I don't either." I said back, looking up and smiling at him. He held his arms out and I accepted the hug, I really needed it and it was even better given to me from Edward.

_**I hope you all liked this. Please remember to leave a Happy Birthday message for xaprilshwrs96 by sending her a private message. Thank you soooo much for reminding her that I'm not the only one who loves her and reading her stories **___

_**I'll update again soon. **_


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N **

**Soooooo….I haven't written in over three months. I know this is a crappy excuse, but I've been really busy. I had Regents exams, homework, graduation stuff, and performing at my Drama play. I hadn't planned on finishing this story, but xaprilshwrs96, being the amazing person she is, convinced me to write again. I'm glad I'm back ****J**** Enjoy!**

_Chapter 8_

_BPOV_

As I stood there in Edward's room, I realized what a mistake this was. I was _not_ the guilty person here. I did not have to feel guilty for anything. I did not come here for him to welcome me back with open arms.

"So are you ever going to tell me why you left?" I asked. I took a few steps back from him.

"Bella. It was such a mistake. I shouldn't have ever left you." He said apologetically.

"That doesn't answer my question." I crossed my arms. I was really starting to get mad. Why had I just kissed him?

"Bella. I love you. I have always loved you." Edward told me looking me directly in the eyes.

And that's when I snapped. I broke our gaze and ran out of his room. I ran straight down the stairs, past the shocked looks of everyone in the living room, out the front door, and down the porch steps. I was stunned that I didn't fall flat out my face. I jumped into the truck and sped out of there. Once I was safely away from vampire hearing range, I pulled over. Edward said he loves me. Still. But then why had he left me? It never made sense that someone as amazing as Edward would want to be with someone as boring and plain as me. Wasn't that why he left? I should have given him more time to explain to me what was going on. Well too late now.

Once I got myself together again, I was able to drive home. I really should have given Edward what I went to his house for – the truth.

I made one of those impulse decisions that you look back on and regret. I picked up the phone and dialed Edward's cell phone number, which I still remembered, embarrassingly enough.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Edward. It's Bella."

"Hello," he replied back. He didn't know what to say either.

"I want to apologize for how I acted earlier. I was a total bitch."

He laughed. "I wouldn't go that far."

"Well, I would. I also really need to talk to you. Can you come over?" I asked him.

"Of course. When?"

"Um…would now be okay?"

_EPOV_

"Um..would now be okay?'' she asked.

"Now would be excellent," I replied, trying not to sound too eager. We hung up.

I heard Alice come into my room, as I was getting my jacket on.

"Yes?" I asked her, not bothering to turn around.

"You're not going to be happy about this." Alice's normal chirpy tone was replaced by an annoyed one. I didn't really pay much attention to the vision swirling around in her head.

"Unless it is life threatening, I do not care. I have to go, if you'll excuse me." I said. She moved to the side of the doorway and let me out.

"It might be life threatening to you," was what her mumble sounded like. But by that point, I was already out the door, and on my way to Bella's house.

_BPOV_

I had no idea how to break up with Edward. Well, technically, it wasn't "breaking up" because we weren't even going out….anymore. But I needed to end whatever was going on. I was still with Jacob, even if Jacob wasn't with me. Speaking of which, the situation with Jacob was still a total mess. He would never answer my phone calls, wouldn't even call me back. Billy wouldn't even let me in the house when I went over yesterday. The thing that hurt most of all was that Jacob really thought that I had planned this all out to hurt him. That really showed how well Jake knew me.

But eventually, I figured how to deal with Edward. I would be as nice as I could, and hope he'd understand. Being as nervous as I was, I doubted if I was actually going to be able to speak.

I went into the kitchen and got a glass of water. I sat down at the kitchen table and traced the rim of my glass with my pinky.

The doorbell rang. Internally freaking out, I got up and went to go let Edward in. But when I got to the door, it wasn't Edward. It was Jacob!

I let him in and neither of us spoke for a few minutes. I decided to break the silence.

"Jake, you can't be here right now."

He laughed without humor. "I come over here, wanting to talk to you, and you kick me out! I feel the love, Bella."

"No, I mean it. You really can't be here. I have people coming over soon." I told him.

"Ahh. You mean people as in good ol' Cullen boy himself."

"No, I mean, well yes. But…" I trailed off, not really wanting to explain this mess to Jacob.

"I knew it." He muttered.

"Jake, this truly isn't what it seems. Edward is coming over because I called and invited him. And you want to know why I invited him? I wanted him to come over here, so I could tell him that I was dating you! So I could tell him that I couldn't be with him anymore!" I exploded, yelling at Jacob.

He looked dumbfounded. And shocked. And happy. And sorry.

"Bella, I'm sorry. I had no idea. I just assumed-"

I cut him off. "Yeah, you obviously assumed took much, didn't you?" I tried so hard not to let him hear the hurt in my voice. At this point, I was practically in tears. I was beyond furious.

And to top off this wonderful day, I noticed someone had come in. Edward. Oh no. Kill. Me. Now.

I turned to face him, but he ignored me. His gaze was solely focused on Jacob. Edward looked a billion times angrier than I had felt a minute ago, when I was fighting with Jacob.

This was so awkward. Jake and Edward were staring at each other. If looks could kill, they both would be lying motionless on the ground, dead. Neither of them said anything. Jacob stormed out of the room and slammed the door behind him. Edward turned, watching him leave, and looking as if he wanted to leave himself. He slowly turned back to face me. The look on his face was a mix of hurt and sadness and every other emotion that could have been experienced when you'd overheard your ex-girlfriend saying she was going to break up with you…again. So, he'd obviously heard my fight with Jacob.

"You're dating the….._dog?" _

"Edward, please let me explain."

"Bella, you don't have to explain anything to me anymore." He said in his velvety voice. He sounded so upset, it was heartbreaking. "I left you, I wanted you to move on, and you have. You have nothing to apologize for."

I had no response for that.

I closed my eyes and rubbed my temples, trying to figure out what to do. Break up with him? Kiss him? Tell him everything is okay? Ugh, this was all such a confusing mess. I opened my eyes back up and looked at Edward.

"I'm going to try to say this as honestly as I can, and I'm not going to guarantee that it isn't going to hurt. But you left me. And that's that. I felt as if my life was over and there was nothing left to live for. But then Jake came into my life, and made me happy again. I felt alive. Jake, Charlie, and Renee were my only reasons to get up in the morning, the only things worth living for." I remained strong, looking at Edward's face throughout my entire monologue, and watched his facial expressions. Frustratingly enough, he kept his face rather neutral. "Edward, I don't know what you want me to say."

"I want you to tell me who you love more. Who you want to be with."

I laughed. "I can't do that."

"Yes, you can. Please, for me." He looked down at me, with such a pained expression that it literally shattered my heart into a thousand pieces. I wanted to tell him that I still loved him and that everything was going to be okay. Those exact words were about to spill out of my mouth, when I thought of Jacob, especially his face when he left here today. That would not be fair to him at all. I loved Jacob so much, he had been there for me through everything I'd gone through in the past few months.

"I want to do this right. I'm not going to commit to anything or anyone for a while." I told him, keeping my voice as steady as possible. "I'm going to tell the same to Jacob as well."

"That's very…reasonable, Bella. I can appreciate that response. I'll see you later." He said to me, trying to fake a smile. I remembered his real smile from so long ago and it sure wasn't this.

"Yeah, Edward. See you later." I mumbled back in response. He turned away from me and walked down the hallway, leaving through the front door.

Yet again, my life had become a jumbled mess.


	9. Chapter 9

_**A/N **_

_**I'm writing again! I hope that's a good thing :) Review! **_

**Jacob POV**

I walked along the beach with my hands shoved deep into my pockets and my head bent against the wind. I sat on the driftwood tree that Bella and I had spent so much time at. Bella. What the hell was she doing? Cullen had left her and she was such a mess. I remember feeling so bad that I couldn't do anything to help her when she was so depressed. Depressed wasn't even the right word to describe how Bella was. She was empty. She was broken. And it killed me so much when I saw her like that. I think that might have even been the reason why I fell even more in love with her. She's incredible. But yet again, I went and screwed everything up. Cullen coming back didn't help much either. Things were just starting to work out between Bella and I. And then he comes waltzing into her life and throws everything off balance.

I'm glad I had come down to the beach this morning, I needed to clear my head. I took a deep breath of that salty ocean air. So clean. I closed my eyes and rested my head on the back of the tree.

Bella had called me this morning saying that things needed to cool off between us for a while. I flipped, asking if she was going back to _him._ She said no, and that she had told him the same thing that she told me. That she needed some alone time, to figure out what she was going to do. When she told me this, I couldn't decide to be happy or not. It means that she loves me enough not to go rushing back to him, but that she still loves him enough to have to think about it. I don't know what I would do if she chose him. It would break my heart, but deep down I wanted Bella happy. She deserved that much.

**BPOV**

I rolled over onto my side in my bed and turned my iPod on. It was about 2 AM and I couldn't sleep. This morning, I had called Jacob and told him what I had told Edward. I couldn't decide what to do about Edward or Jacob. I loved both of them so much it hurt. Years ago, whenever I couldn't decide what to do, my mom had always told me to visualize the future with it. When she told me this, I was probably deciding between a Barbie or a Furby, not the decision of who to spend my life with. I had thought of what my life would be like with Edward ten, twenty, thirty years from now. I would make him change me, and we would be teenagers forever. That was definitely a pro, no matter how selfish it sounds. I loved Edward's family so much. I could deal with Rosalie, so that didn't matter. I would have _forever_ with Edward. _Forever._ That was definitely amazing.

Jacob. I always felt that his pack accepted me, vampire girl and all. They were really nice, and I would find a way to put up with Leah. I'd known Jacob since I was a little girl. Even when my mom left my dad, I still remained good friends with Jacob. When I came to visit Charlie, I would always see Jacob. And when I stopped visiting Charlie on Forks, I still wrote letters, e-mailed, and IM-ed him. Jacob knew everything about me, all flaws included. And he was there for me when no one else was, when Edward left.

Now, onto their faults.

Edward. HE LEFT ME. Told me he loved me, spent an amazing school year and summer with me, and left. Did I mention how he LEFT me? But other than that gigantic detail,. Edward had been wonderful to me. Beyond wonderful.

Jacob. He could be a total ass at times. One of the best examples of this would probably be one of his freak-outs when Edward came back the other day.

Ugh, sorting this into a Pro/Con List was not helping at all. And I still couldn't fall asleep. As much as I loved Jacob, something just kept tugging me towards Edward. And that wasn't helping things at all…

**A/N**

**Well, I hoped you guys liked this. I know this chapter was really short and mainly fluff, but I haven't updated in seven months….and I just needed to write something! Let me know what you think of this….**

**~Dolphinogirl **


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